Stepping Out Of Your Comfort Zone

If you frequent social media you have likely seen more quotes than you can count about stepping out of your comfort zone. Wikipedia defines a comfort zone as “a psychological state in which things feel familiar to a person and they are at ease and in control of their environment, experiencing low levels of anxiety and stress.” Keeping the definition of a comfort zone in mind one could safely assume that stepping out of a comfort zone would mean that things would feel unfamiliar, uneasy, and out of control. Stepping out would also mean that you would likely experience anxiety and stress. So, wait..why are we being encouraged to step out of our comfort zones again?? None of the things that you will likely experience when you step out of your comfort zone sound fun to me. In all fairness though no one ever said that it would be fun or easy. But, I’ve found that in order to experience growth it is so necessary.

In the last 3 years I have stepped out of my comfort zone in so many different areas of my life. As a result I have experienced some of the most uncomfortable, hurtful, heartbreaking times in my life. But you know what else I’ve experienced? Growth. Peace. Happiness. Love. Strength.

Over these last 3 years I’ve tried things that I never thought I would try. For starters, I put myself on a consistent workout regimen that now includes going to the gym 4-5 times a week and most recently I’ve incorporated boxing training into my regimen. There are days that the last thing I feel like doing is going to the gym and boxing challenges me in more ways than I can count because I am not a fighter by nature. I actually apologized for stepping on my trainer’s foot while we were training the other day to which he promptly told me you don’t say excuse me in a fight. lol But, seriously as a result I’ve learned that I actually love working out and training. I would have never known this if I didn’t try it. Feeling great and seeing my body change and get stronger are also not bad outcomes either.

I also started going to therapy. Talk about uncomfortable..but I am learning so much about myself by going. I encourage everyone to go to therapy. There is such a stigma about going to therapy especially in the black community. But finding a therapist that is a good fit for me is one of the best decisions I have made in a really long time.

Over the last two years I also put myself back out there in the romance/relationship department (which is something I said I would never do again). I opened myself up to the possibility of love and as a result I fell in love but… I also got my heart broken. And while the outcome was not what I had hoped it would be I honestly have no regrets. I’m proud of myself for putting myself back out there. It takes strength to let your guard down and allow yourself to be vulnerable. I learned so much about what I like, what I need and what I don’t like as a result. And when the time is right I will put myself back out there again.

Three and half years ago I also left a job that I was comfortable in for eleven years to pursue a career in a completely new industry. A lot of people questioned that decision and I’d be lying if I said there weren’t times that I felt like I made a mistake or that I would never learn to master my new role but I did the work and I stuck with it. Now I can honestly say that I have never been happier when it comes to my career.

So, yes stepping out of your comfort zone can be scary and very tough but I know for a fact that it is necessary in order to experience growth and who doesn’t want to grow? I am so different now than I was three years ago. I am softer yet stronger. I am wiser. I am more forgiving yet I stand up for myself now more than I ever have before. I am learning to say no when something doesn’t serve me. I am learning more about myself everyday and more importantly than that I am learning to love who I was, who I am, and who I am becoming.